unwanted

lalala, hi everyone :) was reading all of the post i post last time. i was so silly back than! lol it have been such a long time i havent been blogging. i think a year plus? haha. i will post often these few days, since i have so many things to say n i doubt anyone will read. ( best place to say out everything) :)
during this one year plus, so many things happen, a relationship for me. i don noe where or how to start. lol but somehow i really need a person to talk to. so i guess i will just say here. after reading those past post, it somehow made me want to go back to the past, where he n i would msg everyday day. where he n i would laugh over little things. endless laugh throughout the nights. yeah, i noe i sounds like i miss him. its the fact i couldnt escape.
these few weeks, i have been trying my best to escape, those feelings,those memories. im so tired.. at a point of time i would think that maybe, dieing would be better. maybe right? who knows :) just now was raining, n yes, evertime the sky startes to rain, i would go crazy n start emoing again .not only wen it rains, everynite it also happens. eventhough it have past for a few weeks, coming to a months, but to me, its like ytd. our memories. how i wish, u would tell me lets forget abt the past, n be together again . hahaha happy dreaming nicole! ahh everything have change so much. why? ill continue tmr i guess :) wait for me ok!! hahaha
                                                         
                                                                                                                       i know to you im the past alrdy, u love someone else now. but to me, all those feelings have nvr change. silly me.